I think I like it better without words. Or maybe it's because I just put them on so sloppily. :\
Inevitable by Anberlin makes me want to close my eyes and remember although I honestly don't remember "when we were just kids" and magical things happened.
I talked to my stuffed animals. That was all. I never had imaginary friends, never ruled kingdoms or flew or talked to aliens or anything. Either I had a deprived childhood, or some people just had charmed ones.
Whatever. I think I was too stupid to think back then. Even now, my coherency is like, 90 billion miles behind everyone, and it seems like my perception of life is 2 years over due, and I'm spending all the time in the world going "aha" but then realizing it's nothing special because all I'm doing is playing catch up.
That doesn't explain my lack of childhood. It just explains my lack of LIFE in general.
I want kickbacks darnit. Hi stalkers (who I try not to acknowledge too much because then I'm afraid I'll start self-cesoring), care to help me out? Buy buy buy from link given. (It occurs to me that a good way to get stalkers is to stalk other people. Because then they stalk themselves through feedback, and it loops back to me getting more stalkers. Oh tricky tricky - but no, that feels really weird.)
I need more legit ways of earning money blah.
Being cached by google is kind of intimidating. I'm only beginning to realize the implications of that. Oh internet. Maybe ignorance is bliss after all.
I look at last week's, last month's work, and it all looks better than now.
There are probably worse feelings in the world, but of late the most horrible sinking sensations I've felt are: One; being in a room of people who all know each other and looking in from the outside and feeling isolated and almost horribly like you're being suffocated and strangled alive because you lack the social skills to break out of your bubble. Two; overwhelmed with boredom and procrastination to the point where you just want to roll around on your bed or spin around in your chair or writhe on the floor yelling i'mboredi'mboredi'mbored when there are a hundred thousand things that should be but are probably not going to be done, where the juxtaposition of "I have a keen desire to create something meaningful with my life" and "somehow nothing seems to interest me anymore" almost tears you apart from the inside. Three; sitting on the sidelines, watching everyone else play the sport that you honestly love, slaving through the drills and footwork and matches, and feeling incredibly jealous at their ability to move like you once could. knowing that you shouldn't stress your muscles, but feeling like you're betraying the sport itself by not giving it your bestest, even when all logic tells you should stop. when you feel like you've let down yourself, your coach, and the sport itself just by stopping, and it somehow makes more sense to kill yourself trying than to let your injury rest. mental and physical pain.
Digital photography is not any easier than old school film photography. You still have to try a zillion times to get the right composition and lighting and whatever to capture what you want. You still have to experiment, you still have to play, and you still have to fail ten thousand times over before you can become good. You know, all it really does is eliminate the technical bracketing and the whole "aim and hopetothepowersthatbe that you make" thing. You don't have to get all haughty and superior just because you're doing something harder. Film isn't that much harder, that much more advanced, or that much more real by far.
Call us n00bs for experimenting around, because we tend to over process stuff. Honestly, I'll call you n00b for not knowing that film can be processed to horrible degrees too. Oh that's right, you're too n00b to process your own film.
Somehow anything that gets overlaid with the grainy texture of old-school photography is great because it brings back the nostalgia of the old times. But people need more than just memories to express themselves. And saying that anything that is film-grained is awesome just because of that is just as ridiculous as saying that anything post-processed-digitally is great.
I will respect film photography even though I think it kills polar bears and is pretty obscenely inefficient (especially if you're going to man up and actually develop your film). You, don't be a hater 'kay?
Just because everyone else does it, doesn't mean you can't. Just because everyone else does it, doesn't mean it can't be cool.
(From the way I write these I'm obviously trying to convince someone. From the way no one I know actually reads these... I'm convinced that I'm just trying to convince myself.)
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And then I proceed to kill all validity for my argument by showcasing some obviously n00b photos. What a failure. I'm getting too lazy to postprocess. Is that just laziness? or is that I am being enlightened and now no longer need post processing? Or is it "nonsense, everyone needs postprocessing"?
I can't believe I'm writing about this. It kind me makes me feel... dirty. Ahh, the things I do for money. Whatever. The internet blogger has no shame.
One word explanation for this: blogvertise (www.blogvertise.com)
This proves capitalism and free market and all the econ principles about a thousand times over.
...
... this is kind of nerve wracking, like taking a deep deep breath before jumping off a tall cliff.
Anyway. Here goes.
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Frankly, I've never really given much thought to underwear. Typically, I like my underwear to be one color (preferably light colored) so that it won't show if I wear like, white pants or something. But other than that whatever. A lot of my underwear have monkeys and weird cartoon things that are quite embarrassing to show to other people. But that's not really the point here. The point is that I don't really care what my underwear looks like because no one ever sees it. And all underwear feels the same after 5 minutes. Basically, my philosophy is that all underwear is the same, and you really should spend your time doing other more productive things (like reading books or helping the community) instead of picking out your underwear. Honestly? In the grand scheme of things, choice of underwear is about the last thing on my list.
Well I guess that's why they need desperate people like me to attract attention to this forlorn subject. I think Diesel underwear is probably... well... your average underwear. I think it's cute that they write things on the waistband. Maybe if they printed quotes that I liked, I would actually be tempted to buy one. They seem completely based online, considering how all the testimonials are done through email and weblog and whatever. I actually wouldn't be surprised if they got a poor desperate soul from Textbroker to write the blurb. Oh, desperate people and their online industries.
Their website seems kind of sketchy and boring. I've never heard of them, so they're probably not a "well known household name" (though that might also be because I don't look at the brands of the clothes I buy). I doubt there's anything special about Diesel underwear, but I suppose it might be nice to look into if you're too embarrassed to face the agony of actually buying underwear at a store. Or if you're just too lazy to haul your butt to said store. There doesn't seem to be anything terribly wrong with them, but there doesn't seem to be anything terribly good about Deisel underwear either.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBa9QlzEWA4 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RdrQy0j39E Part of Your World - Little Mermaid This is just amazing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DUXVAg7oWg&NR=1 Under the Sea - Little Mermaid This is just weird.
Crap. I have listened to Part of Your World like 20 times in a row on repeat, and I still can't stop. It's so... passionate. Especially the Broadway version. But both are so. I don't know. Soul-baring. Raw. Pure. Innocent.
Miley Cyrus needs to stop desecrating soul-wrenching-music (like Part of Your World) and turning it into some weird hip hop thing. I guess... sure, artistic liberties, whatever. But the original is God. You don't trifle with such things usually. It makes me close-mindedly-angry because holyyoujustdon'tdothat.
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I don't even know how to begin to explain this picture. 3 words. Geocaching. Travel bugs. Flint 4x4.
Basically.
Hello stranger,
I took your item and did things that you wanted with it, and plan to pass it on to another stranger. I don't know why, but I actually care about carrying out your desires (especially since I think the goal of visiting fire houses is pretty noble and cute). But as I helped you, I realized I was making myself just as happy as I was probably making you. It was a pretty nice feeling.
